Burdens We Carry And Blessings We Claim

Every human has a unique life story. Most of us, however, forget what really happened. Instead, we get stuck in the old interpretation of events which we think is what happened. If POWER comes from being profoundly related to reality, then this keeps us from experiencing our own power.

There are many people I know who relate to understanding of who they are as an unnecessary rehashing of the past, or opening up a can of worms. Unfortunately, I feel that this often correlates with their abiility to grow and get out of their own way. You can’t clear what you don’t see.

If anyone takes massive action in one area of their life, they are bound to be successful. But how do you grow more holistically and don’t get the sweetness of success in a way of you being truly content and realized as a human?

When we grow and expand our potential future, it helps to find “roots” for it in our past. In Family Constellation work, for example, you get to see the gifts and talents that are present in your family line. You physically represent those who are behind you to let yourself experience that you are an extension of their gifts. This prevents you from trying to make something happen out of thin air. You’ll feel more grounded and connected.

An example:

My paternal grandfather was one of suriving 6 children (8 of his brothers and sisters died in early childhoord). He came from a very rural part of Montenegro, to Zagreb, Croatia to become a medical doctor, and from there to Sorbonne, Paris, to become a Cardiologist and Doctor of Medicine.

He was offered a job at Sorbonne but decided to go back to Montenegro and work with his people. Even though he was well educated, his beginnings were humble. He was not well connected so he worked where there was an openning and never complained. While the main hospital was waiting to give him a job as a cardiologist, he began to work with the army, as their doctor and remained loyal to them until his retirement. Even after he retired, he picked up another gig to support his family. Until the day he died, at 88, he accepted patients at home and never asked them to pay.

The way I remember him is always reading, typing, writing, recording and making something. He self-published many short books on alcoholism, dark intrigue of suicide, biology & psychology of life while citing Shakespare, Froyd and Njegoš (Montenegrin Bishop and poet). He had many books with pictures of illnesses our people suffered from tracking where it all started and how it was represented in literature and lived experience.

I didn’t fully appreciate any of it at the time.  

In fact, in my second year of college, I changed majors to study Film and Media and was categorical about not wanting to become a medical doctor despite his many offers to pay for my medical school. Instead, I forged my own path studying Film, Arts, Psychology, Reiki, Yoga, Meditation, Family Constellation, Transformation and Awareness.

If I didn’t feel my grandpa’s blessing behind me, I would feel less confident about my journey today.  The way I integrate different modalities and continue to learn 20 years after receiving my Master’s degree makes me feel like I am truly on my path that includes my grandfather’s gifts (but is not limited to them).  

I disentangled from the disappointment that I didn’t become a doctor and fully embrace that I facilitate a healing art of life instead.

You also have inherited gifts from your ancestors and lessons from your teachers.  To utilize them fully requires awareness and some clearing up because regardless of what people did before you, you can still exercise choice.  I certainly did.

But most importantly, you didn’t come here out of thin air; you belong to a larger belonging.

You are also responding to real-life events that happened to you or your family of origin.  Beyond the reactions to those events and all the noise, there is a silent thread that is your life force, your nourishment, and your blessing.

That is the journey I take my clients, my children and anyone who’d listen on: be informed by the past, but don’t feel pressured by it or unconsciously repeat it.  Burdens can stop with us and blessings can continue through us.